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Are You In Love with a “Potential Vision” of Your Partner?

One of my formative love relationships was with a charismatic young man who dazzled me. He was worldly, intellectual, articulate, passionate, and sophisticated. I was so inspired by many facets of him that I am grateful for our experience together. But I am even more grateful that I have finally extricated myself from the clutches

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Overcoming Polyamory Distress through Healing Complex PTSD and Anxious Attachment

“Own your shit.” “Do the inside job.” “It’s your soul’s journey.” “You are responsible for your emotions, not me.” “If you truly loved me, you’d be happy for me.” I don’t consider myself a polyamory proponent. I believe it works for some and not for others. I do believe that polyamory has the potential heal

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How to Write an Open Relationship Rules Agreement that Works

One of the first concepts I came across in reading polyamory and consensual non-monogamy bibles such as Opening Up and More than Two was a relationship rules agreement. This is a set of boundaries or guidelines designed to allow each person in an open relationship to engage with the outside world while protecting the original relationship. In my first marriage,

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